12 Reasons Why My Kids Gross Me Out!

I love my kids. In fact, nobody can bring me to tears quicker, or make me laugh harder, than these amazing people. I’ve been blessed beyond anything I could imagine. But, good grief can they gross me out. In fact, there are times when I marvel at the level of gross they can descend to in such a short amount of time. It may be a gift!

Photo courtesy of istockphoto.com

Photo courtesy of istockphoto.com

So, to get the weekend started off on a light-hearted note, here are 12 reasons why my kids gross me out (counted down from #12 of course):

#12- I find pee-soaked pull-ups stuffed in a trashcan at least a week after they were disposed.

#11- My son wipes his snotty nose on nearly every shirt I have on when I pick him up.

#10- Because he doesn’t want to interrupt his playtime in the backyard, my son uses his pants as a toilet.

#9- Speaking of toilets- when my sons aim every where else in the bathroom, except the toilet bowl, and then my wife and I walk barefoot through the bathroom or sit down on the toilet seat later on!

#8- When I tell my sons not to let any part of their body touch the urinal in a public bathroom and they proceed to drop their pants to their ankles and rest the entire lower half of their bodies against the rim- Awesome! 

#7- Feminine products that are not disposed of properly and come tumbling out on the floor when we empty trash cans around the house for trash collection day!

#6- My son sticks his head in a public urinal and screams just so he can “hear the funny echo.

#5- We find our pre-teen’s toothbrush, dry and unused, in their suitcase, weeks after camp is over.

#4- We find most of the clothes we packed for them for camp still folded the exact same way they were when we dropped them off a week earlier and it was at least 90 degrees all week.

#3- Finding used dental floss in my youngest son’s room because “he needed it to make his toy better!

#2- Finding pee-soaked sheets stuffed at the bottom of a laundry basket days after they wet the bed.

And the #1 reason why my kids gross me out is….. going number 2 and then not washing their hands before sitting down at the dinner table! (You can’t see me but I’m gagging even as I type those words!)

I’ve said it before, in many past posts, and I’ll say it again- you gotta love kids, right? I’m thankful that mine balance out the grossness with lots of hilarious and tender moments.

Question: What are some things that your kids do that gross you out? You can leave a comment by clicking here.

 

 

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  • MaMeex5

    With 5 kids we have a few. Had one that pooped in a trashcan and hid it couldn’t figure out where the smell was coming from for over a week, peed sheets stuffed in the back of the bathroom cabinet, peeing in the bathtub so they didn’t have to flush or wipe, not wiping, or worse wiping and missing and getting it on their hands then using the walls to clean their hands. Finding nose treasures on the walls and furniture is another of my favorites.

    • Oh my goodness I nearly spit my coffee out as I read your comment. Thanks for sharing. We’re in the same boat.

  • No Matter What Mom

    We’ve had nearly everything previously mentioned, but I can add a few more:

    Finding that my son had emptied the liquid hand-soap dispenser in the guest bathroom and refilled it with his own urine right before the start of a Child and Family Team meeting.

    Finding fossilized pizza and used sanitary supplies wrapped in my daughter’s nightgown and stuffed in her bathroom vanity.

    Finding baked beans and melted ice cream stuck to the floor under a pile of my son’s toys and realizing that a family of large cockroaches had found it first.

    Starting to assemble the artificial Christmas tree, only to realize that it was dripping urine from my son peeing in the closet where the tree was stored.

    And possibly my all-time low, arriving home to find my son and his direct-support person locked in an unsuccessful struggle to prevent my son from throwing his latest science experiment down the kitchen sink disposal. The hypothesis was “I think that something interesting will happen if I mix green slime, silica water crystals, gravel, olive oil and a lot of urine in a plastic container and hide it in my room for several days. The mixture made it into the disposal. I spent the next half hour with my hand in the disposal, running lots of water to keep those water crystals too engorged to go through the disposal screen and into the plumbing and sewer lines, where they would never have dried out enough to get washed off of our property and into the city sewer system. I fished about two quarts of slimy, urine-soaked crystals and a hand-full of gravel out of the disposal before it was over. Thank you to the school science fair for letting my son charm them out of three weird science starter kits.

    Our kids came to us at ages four, eight, and nine. I had no idea that urine could be used so creatively to express so many feelings. I had no idea that hoarded food could be hidden in so many places. I had no idea how many smokers apparently drop ALMOST empty butane lighters in places where only my son can spot them or how quickly and quietly a traumatized child can pocket something or elope from the premises.

    • Wow! You are living our life too! I had to laugh at the Christmas Tree point. Good stuff. Thanks for commenting.

      • No Matter What Mom

        No regrets! After five years of struggle, this sixth year has been one of watching our kids make great strides in all areas. I wasn’t sure we would ever get to a place where every minute wasn’t hard, but we are having a lot of good times lately–sometimes several hours without a meltdown. There are even whole days when being a family feels really good and we don’t feel like we are navigating a minefield without a map.