To Medicate Or Not To Medicate? That Is The Question!

Season 5, Episode 43- The Honestly Speaking Parenting Podcast

It’s a hot topic question in the foster and adoptive community right now. Should I medicate my child? And if so, what medications are right? We’re discussing this on today’s podcast episode.

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We’ve all been down the medication route. Several times, in fact. We’ve learned what works, what doesn’t work, and what should be avoided altogether. Beyond that, we’ve also found helpful alternatives to medication. We fully understand this is a gray area in the foster and adoptive community, but on today’s episode of Honestly Speaking, we’re talking openly from all sides of this discussion.

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No, You Don’t Have To Live In Isolation Anymore!

I know what you want to do, and what feels natural, when all hell breaks loose with your child. But I’m here to tell you, you don’t have to do that anymore.

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You are not alone.

If I had a dollar for every time those words left my lips and crossed the space between me and the person I was standing in front of? Let’s just say…beach house in Malibu. Or better fitting…1000 acre farm at the foot of a ginormous mountain in rural Montana where my kids could run wild and free, and any outbursts, meltdowns, glass-breaking, dish-smashing tirade, brought on by trauma (or that simmer we always talk about), wouldn’t be heard by a living soul for miles. Foster and adoptive parent: you feeling me on this one? 

We are very excited to announce that we will be back at The Refresh Conference in 2018. This is the premier conference for foster and adoptive parents, and kinship providers. We believe it’s a must-attend. To learn more about Refresh, click below…

Learn more about The Refresh Conference

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Interested in bringing us to your event? Click here!

Date: March 2, 2018—March 3, 2018
Event: The Refresh Conference- Seattle
Location: Seattle, Washington
Public: Public
More Info: Click here for more information.

We will both be speaking at the In This Together Couple’s Retreat for foster and adoptive parents on September 22-24, 2017.

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Date: September 22, 2017—September 24, 2017
Event: In This Together Couple's Retreat
Location: Abilene, Texas
Public: Private

How Can The Church Support Foster And Adoptive Families?

Season 5, Episode 42- The Honestly Speaking Parenting Podcast

It’s a big question we receive often, from church leaders and families in the trenches: how can the church better support foster and adoptive families?

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Unfortunately, over the past 15 years we’ve been on this journey, we’ve seen a few churches get this extremely right, but many get it extremely wrong. Personally, our family has walked through a few situations where the church was no support at all. But, we believe in the church and the impact it can have in this world, and for foster and adoptive families.

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Your Child’s Behavior Is Not An Attack On You (But It Sure Does Feel Like It)!

It’s really hard to not take your child’s meltdowns, outbursts, or aggression personally. In the heat of the moment how do you differentiate between trauma and a personal attack on you?

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For years I misunderstood my child’s behavior. The aggression, words, and defiance were all an attack on me! Or so I thought. I’d shake my fists at the heavens and beg for a better behaved child, or at least a “fix-it” solution. I even tried to parent the way I was parented, growing up. I’d set up the boundaries, I’d reinforce the rules, and if said boundaries or rules were crossed, BAM… consequences enforced. If you acted like a little jerk to me in front of my friends, or at church, GROUNDED! If you acted out, stole something, hid food under your bed, BUSTED! And to be quite honest, for years I felt as though we were running in a hamster wheel. Not only did I see zero traction, but I didn’t like the way my disciplinarian style was making me (or my child) feel. Bottom line: it wasn’t working.

There’s A Reason The Foster And Adoptive Journey Isn’t Perfect.

As much as we wish we were called into a journey that was easy, problem free, and had a lot less pit falls, we’re just not. It’s far from perfect and there’s a reason for this.

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I’m typing this from 30,000 feet above the earth as I fly to Denver, Colorado for a one-day conference for foster and adoptive parents, called Spotlight. I was there last year, and it was amazing. Such beautiful people with hearts for the vulnerable children in their city. It’s quite amazing to see. I should say that I’m a bit on cloud 9 after last weekend at The Refresh Conference in Seattle. It’s been a week, and I can’t stop thinking about all we experienced. We absolutely loved our time in the Pacific Northwest with all of the amazing people we call friends and family. We feel this way every year after the conference ends. Yes, it’s that amazing.