Am I Causing My Child’s Behavior To Escalate?

We are immersed in the day in and day out task of parenting our children. Often this leaves us emotionally spent. It’s easy to let our emotions fly out of control when our children are dis-regulated. But is this causing more damage than we realize?

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My son spent the entire car ride antagonizing his younger brothers and asking me the same questions over and over. Three long hours on the way to grandma and grandpa’s house for Thanksgiving. Three hours of giving the same answers to the same questions I’d given countless times before. Three hours of listening to obsessive talk over and over. Three hours of wishing he’d just go to sleep. Three…long…hours.

How To See Grief As A Gift.

Season 7, Episode 61- The Honestly Adoption Podcast

Loss.  Pain.  Sorrow.  Grief.    These are no strangers to those of us on this adoption and foster care journey.  How do we deal with these losses and all of this pain?  What do we do when our heartache is more than we can bear?  Is it actually possible we could learn to see grief as a gift?

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Join us on this episode of The Honestly Adoption Podcast, as Mike and Kristin interview our good friend, and fellow blogger, Natalie Brenner, and how she learned to see grief as a gift.

How To Make Sense Of Attachment Issues In Children From Trauma.

Season 7, Episode 60- The Honestly Adoption Podcast

“What are some common signs that my child may have attachment issues?”  “What can I do to build healthy attachments with my child?”  “Why do I feel like my child is always trying to manipulate me?”  Have you ever struggled with any of these questions?  Be sure not to miss out this week on:

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In this episode of The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Mike and Kristin interview the ever-so-popular Deborah Gray (LCSW) on how to make sense of attachment issues in children from trauma.

Dear Broken Parent: It’s Not Your Fault!

It’s really, really hard to not take your child’s behavior personally. In fact, it’s downright impossible at times. But I promise…it’s not your fault. Here’s why:

Sad young mother (age 30) with her crying daughter in background.

I confess. I used to be really, really mad at my kid. Scratch that: enraged. I was enraged. Every time he acted out, destroyed something in my home, terrorized one of my other kids, hurt my wife, wound up in the principal’s office, did something to the neighbor kid, I saw red. My blood boiled. I would react to him out of anger. I said so many things I regret. I did things I wish I could go back in time and undo.

Thoughts On Transracial Adoption From A Transracial Adoptee.

Season 7, Episode 59 - The Honestly Adoption Podcast

“My mission is really to bring adoptee voices more to the forefront…I really think that adoptees are the experts of their experiences.” – Angela Tucker

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Welcome to our recently re-named podcast, The Honestly Adoption Podcast! What a treat this week to be joined by none other than Angela Tucker, a nationally-recognized thought leader on transracial adoption and an advocate for adoptee rights.  Listen in as Mike and Kristin talk with Angela about her story and perspective as a transracial adoptee and as she answers some of their tough questions.

When Church Becomes A Negative Experience For Adoptive Families.

One of the biggest places we’ve felt the least amount of support and understanding is the church. But this needs to change. It begins by honestly communicating the reality of our “church” experience…

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I hate going to church. I’m not one to beat around the bush. So yes, I hate it! It sounds shocking, I know. Especially since my husband’s a pastor. Not just the Sunday morning kind of church either. I hate all church functions. Bible studies. Small groups. That kind of church.

Understanding The Behaviors Of Children With FASDs.

Season 7, Episode 58- The Honestly Adoption Podcast

We receive hundreds of emails every month from parents who are struggling with children suffering from the effects of prenatal alcohol exposure.  The daily challenge of living with children who rage, lack of impulse control, and seem to never learn can be beyond frustrating!

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We are extremely blessed this week to have Dr. Ira Chasnoff join us to kick off our very first Honestly Adoption Podcast!  Dr. Chasnoff wants us to know that there is hope for both parents and their children as we learn to approach our children by first looking at the major effect and changes alcohol has on the brain. Then, we look beyond and behind the behaviors, and finally, we find regulatory strategies to help our children thrive.  Join Mike, Kristin, and Nicole as they chat with Dr. Chasnoff about all this and more!

What Do You Do When Your Child Fares Better In A Residential Facility?

Placing your child in residential treatment is a bridge no parent wants to cross. But what happens when you realize he or she is doing better there than they did in your house? It happens often. What do you do? How do you respond? Here are some thoughts…

Prayer

It’s a warm sunny afternoon on a Saturday in early September when we load our kids up in our super-used Chevy Suburban to make the hour and half trek across our state to visit our kid in residential treatment. This is not our first rodeo with this scenario. We’ve been here before. It never gets easier. Sure, it becomes routine…after some time, but never easier. On this particular afternoon we’re confined to campus due to bad behavior in the days prior.