How Do I Maintain Respect For A Birthparent When Their Choices Are So Bad?

Season 5, Episode 45- The Honestly Speaking Parenting Podcast

On this episode of Honestly Speaking, Matt, Mike, Nicole and Kristin discuss one of the biggest questions foster and adoptive parents have when it comes to birth parents: How can I respect a person who’s made so many bad choices?

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We’ve spoken at conferences where people have nearly come out of their seats they were so angry when we talk about the importance of respecting birth parents. I’m not kidding. Birth parent relationships are an extremely sensitive topic among foster and adoptive parents. Some prefer to keep them at a distance while others genuinely want to know how to maintain a healthy, respectful relationship with them. Today’s episode provides some practical advice.

Listen to the Episode.

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Notes and Quotes from the Show.

  • Born Broken book + Amazing Bonuses: For just a little while longer you will be able to receive full access to our highest owner level of our self-care parenting course, The Resting Place, when you purchase Kristin’s new book, Born Broken. Visit bornbrokenbook.com for details.
  • Oasis Community Enrollment: This coming Monday, April 10th, we officially open up enrollment for our brand new support and resource site for foster and adoptive parents called Oasis Community. If you haven’t done so already, make sure you’re on the email update list. You’ll be glad you signed up. Visit oasiscommunity.me for the full scoop.

Question: Is the topic of birth parent relationships one that hits home for you? Share your story with us in the comment section below You can leave a comment by clicking here.

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  • Wendy

    I believe the birth mother of my son is totally unstable. My son is 13 years old and has been with us since birth. She lived in this fantasy story that we stole her child. I have over the past year connected with her thinking that she was a woman now with children of her own. The way that I connected was she put a page on facebook with my son’s name on it telling sad sick lies about losing him. I reported it and had it removed. She convinced me that she totally understands that I am his mother now but puts quotes on her pinterest page about raising an adolesent child. When I know for a fact she doesn’t have one. Her daughter has connected on PS4 with my son but her mother has already taken over the mike to talk to him. I don’t let him use the mike now when they are on. He doesn’t want anything to do with her and now I am fearful that I have opened a pandoras box. I am debating whether or not I should cut off all ties with her.