Is It Disobedience Or Lack Of Sleep?

The Honestly Adoption Podcast- Season 13, Episode 109

We’ve all seen the signs with our children. Rubbing their eyes, irritable, erratic, frustrated, disobedient, you name it. They’re tired. But often, we can mistake lack of sleep for bad behavior. It’s not, but in our busy lives, it’s easy to miss the signs…

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In this latest episode of The Honestly Adoption podcast we walk through signs and symptoms of a lack of sleep. When we parent children with a trauma history, we have to remember that vigilance, and fear, and anxiety can cause them to not sleep. What do we do? How do we respond? Listen to the episode now…

Is It Disobedience Or Triggered Behavior?

The Honestly Adoption Podcast- Season 13, Episode 108

It’s easy for parents who are caring for children with a trauma history to mistake triggered behavior for disobedience. But, when you understand the origin of behavior, your entire perspective changes. Join us for this week’s episode as we discuss this topic…

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Often, when our children are agitated, irritable, or aggressive, we can default to a traditional mindset when it comes to their behavior. We mistake trauma-induced behaviors for selfishness, belligerence, and disobedience. But this comes out of a lack of understanding as to how a child with a trauma history can be triggered. Sights, smells, sounds, activity, and more can cause a child to escalate without us even knowing it. In this latest episode of The Honestly Adoption podcast, we not only walk through the signs of triggered behavior, but also how to respond. Listen to the episode now

When You Still Have to Parent Adult Children

This is a guest post from Melissa Corkum. Melissa is a parent and wellness coach helping parents move from chaos to calm and confidence. She is an adult adoptee and married to Patrick. They live in Maryland and are parents to 6 kids by birth and adoption and soon-to-be grandparents. She writes at thecorkboardonline.com and is the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a resource site and podcast for adoptive and foster families.

It’s a reality that many of us on the adoption journey will face. We will be actively involved in hands on parenting with our adult children in ways most parents will not. How do you face this with hope and a plan?

There’s nothing magical about the age 18. Sure, there are some legal ramifications, but it doesn’t get us off the hook as parents.
Research shows that brains aren’t even fully developed until 25 or 30. For our kids who experienced trauma early in life, this may take even a few more years. I can feel you starting to hyperventilate. You’re probably imagining your child at 30, on your basement sofa, surrounded by Doritos bags, eyes glazed over from 20 straight hours of video games.

Take a few deep breaths.

As with all other parenting, the sweet spot for parenting adult children needs high structure along with high nurture. There needs to be healthy boundaries in place, but also compassion that kids from trauma may need extra support and time to launch into a more independent life.

Is It Disobedience Or Sensory Input Needs?

The Honestly Adoption Podcast- Season 13, Episode 107

In our latest episode of The Honestly Adoption Podcast we answer the question, “Is it disobedience or sensory input needs?” Watch below now on YouTube or download the audio…

We often confuse the need for sensory input for bad behaviors, or a child who just can’t settle down. But for children who have a trauma history, and have lost control of that area of their life, there is a deep need for comfort and security that they do not know how to articulate. So, it comes out through behaviors. In today’s episode we discuss strategies to help your child receive the sensory input he, or she, needs. Listen to the episode now…

Is It Disobedience Or Problems With Their Diet?

The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Season 13, Episode 106

It’s Week 3 of our new podcast series we’re calling “Is It Disobedience Or Something Else?” In this episode we discuss some of the problems a poor diet can create for our children.

It’s something we often overlook when it comes to our children’s behaviors- diet. How much does diet play into behaviors that often make no sense, or come out of nowhere, so it seems? Listen to the episode now…

This Is For Every Child With A Special Need

Like many of you, we watched Kodi Lee’s performance on America’s Got Talent last week through tears and celebration. But his performance meant something beyond deep and meaningful for every child with a special need, and their parents.

You can do anything!  

You are not discredited or disqualified because you have a disability, or a special need!

You are equal to all human beings!

Is It Disobedience Or Lack Of Executive Functioning?

The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Season 13, Episode 105

On today’s episode of the The Honestly Adoption Podcast we are continuing our series called “Is It Disobedience Or Something Else,” by answering the question, “Is it disobedience or lack of executive functioning?” Our show is now available to watch on YouTube. Check it out..

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For the next several weeks we are asking the question, “Is it disobedience or something else?” The reality is, children who have experienced significant trauma display behaviors that can often be misinterpreted as disobedience. But the truth is, there is so much more going on.

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Why We’re Not Sending Our Child To Residential Treatment Again

We’ve been down this road in the past. Several times if I’m being honest. But now, we’ve decided to change our entire approach to parenting our child.

I’ll never forget December 15, 2014. I sat alongside my wife in a cozy office, in another state, clutching both of my knees with my hands so tightly, I’m sure they left a mark. Just outside the window to my left the gray conglomerate of trees, left naked from winter winds, glistened with a fresh coating of frost in the early sunlight. I would normally take in this type of beauty, and marvel at the winter stillness, but not today. I could hear the intake person ask me questions. He must have repeated himself several times. But it was sort of like watching a movie where everything slows down, even the dialogue and facial expressions, and the protagonist only hears echoes of someone’s voice, not clear words.