How Will Understanding My Child’s Trauma Help Me As A Parent?

We have said this repeatedly over the past 5 years. When you gain an understanding of how trauma has changed your child, your entire parenting journey will change. Here’s why…

I will never forget the moment my mind was fully opened to the reality of what our children have experienced and why they do and say the things they do at times. It was Christmastime, six years ago. On a cold December night, something triggered our child, who has a trauma history. We were popping popcorn, pulling out blankets, and settling down in our family room for a family movie night. For reasons that remain a mystery, he wasn’t having any of it.

How To Translate Your Child’s Behavior

The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Season 18, Episode 141

This week we’re in Part 2 of our new podcast series, Believing Beyond The Behavior, and we’re talking about how to translate your child’s behavior.

You may have taken a double-take when you read that title. Translate my child’s behavior? What does that mean? The fact is, when you’re caring for a child with a trauma history, you should never take their extreme behaviors at face-value. Why? Well, behavior is a by-product of something bigger going on with them. When we pull back the curtain and get behind the facade of bad behavior, we discover a whole different story. Listen to the episode for more…

How Can I Empower My Child To Process The Good Parts Of Their Story?

Celebration seems like a normal part of our humanity, but for children who have experienced great loss, the ability to celebrate isn’t a given. How can we empower our children to process the good parts of their story?

 Have you ever met a person who seems to sabotage every good thing? Do you know someone who avoids family gatherings, such as Thanksgiving or Christmas? How about someone who always seems to see the glass half empty? The child who cannot seem to relax and have a good time may simply not know how.

How To Begin Believing In More

The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Season 18, Episode 140

There’s more happening with your child than just bad behavior. In fact, there are reasons why he or she behaves the way they do. But before we can make sense of this, we must lay the foundation for believing in more.

It begins with a different mindset. You cannot take your child’s behavior at face-value. Because of his or her trauma history, there present behaviors are often the expression of an unmet need, a fear, or an anxiety. But this present behavior does not determine their future. How do you begin to believe there is more than what you are experiencing right now? Listen to the episode…

Introducing: Believing Beyond The Behavior

The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Season 18, Episode 139

Your child’s behavior is routinely agitated, anxious, aggressive, violent, or impulsive. And you’re exhausted. You don’t know how you can make it one more day. But you must. How do you keep going? Our new podcast series will walk you through this and so much more…

Next Thursday, May 14th, we are kicking off a brand new 6 week podcast series all about believing beyond the behavior. Through this series we’re going to help you gain new perspective on your child’s behavior, plus the tools to parent differently. Listen in now to learn more…

How To Follow A Safety Plan In Public Without Embarrassment

Following a safety plan in your home is fairly cut and dry. You establish the plan, you follow the plan, and often the plan is discussed openly amongst you and your children. But that changes when you’re in public. How do you continue to follow your plan and not embarrass your children?

This may seem like a moot subject during this current landscape of life. At some point, however, we’re going to return to normal and begin interacting with others outside of our home. When that time comes, you will have to hold up the safety plan you created to keep your children, and other children safe. But how do we do that and not face embarrassment?

Living In Your New Normal (Part 3): Accepting

The Honestly Adoption Podcast- Season 17, Episode 137

As we continue to live in the new normal of the COVID-19 pandemic, there’s a point where we must begin to accept life as it is. How do we do that when we are parenting children who struggle with change?

Over the past month we have had several conversations with families who are struggling to keep their head above water in this new normal. Their children have already dealt with so much loss in their young lives. It begs the question: will we ever arrive to a place of acceptance? Will we ever full adjust to this new way of life (for however long it lasts?) And if so, how do we help our children (many of which, have little ability to adapt to new circumstances), adjust? In today’s episode we give some practical steps you can take to move toward acceptance. Listen to the episode…

Is It Possible To Overdo Therapeutic Parenting?

Once we discover therapeutic parenting strategies, we go all-in. It’s a lightbulb moment. But is it possible to overdo it, or apply the strategies so much that they become enabling? Here’s some perspective…

“Don’t you understand how to work with kids from trauma?” my nine-year-old screamed at the bus driver as he exited the doors of the school bus and stepped onto our long driveway. He turned around and continued, “You have to talk to us in a calm voice! My brain has flipped right now, and I’m freaking out!” I scurried to the end of the driveway and stood at the open door of the bus, staring directly into the bus driver’s red face. He was not amused. “Go inside now,” I firmly told our son, and then I apologized to the driver.