The holiday season, specifically Christmas break, is often a dreaded time for foster and adoptive parents because it means a lack of normal structure for their kiddos. How do you navigate through this time successfully?
In this special Encore episode of The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Mike and Kristin discuss tips and tricks for maintaining a level of regulation during the chaos of the Holiday season with Licensed Mental Health Counselor and therapist, Ruth Graham. This was part of our 2017 special Holiday Podcast Series called “Holiday Survival Tips and Tricks.” Listen now…
The disastrous car rides, the grocery store trips that abruptly end in fights, the movie nights that turn into tears. What do you do when one of your children continually causes all your children to be disregulated? How do you stop them? On today’s episode of the podcast, we’re answering this big question…
This one resonates deeply with us. We’ve stood helplessly by and watched all of our other children, who are just trying to ride to church, or school, in peace, move into a complete emotional tailspin because one of our children cannot keep their hands, or comments, to themselves. And the day is completely ruined! Ever been there? When we’re talking about children from past trauma, we’re also talking about impulsive and often frustrating behavior. Oftentimes, they can’t even help it.
But that’s not fair to your other children! How do you stop this from happening, or at least better manage it when it does? Listen in as we answer this question…
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Over the past few months, we’ve been inundated with emails asking this question. We get it. We’ve felt it. We’ve been there. And here’s what we have to say about it.
Sometimes I nod feverishly when I read through emails from readers who pour their broken hearts out. Sometimes I forget to actually hit reply because I’m so engrossed in the pain they are sharing with me. Their son has pushed them to the edge with his behavior…held the entire family hostage…traumatized his younger brothers and sisters to the point of everyone needing therapy…disrupted any ounce of a normal life.
We talk often about forming positive relationships with birth families. But what do you do when you can’t get past the anger you feel toward them?
If you know us, you know we are strong advocates for open adoption. We often write and speak in favor of open relationships with a child’s birth family. In our own family we have regular contact with biological parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and even brothers and sisters. We feel that if it is possible and safe to have an open relationship with a child’s birth family, you should.
Sometimes, as foster and adoptive parents, we’re pushed over the edge and we lose our cool with our children. How do you pick up the pieces and move forward after you’ve failed your children?
It started with a disrespectful look, or so I thought. I had asked my 13-year old daughter to do something she knew was her responsibility and the face she made when I asked her for the 4th time, angered me. It quickly escalated into something greater and it was my fault. Sure, she made the face at me, talked disrespectfully, but it didn’t warrant the hurtful words, or angry outburst that came from me.
It’s time to get out of bed but you don’t want to. Ever felt this way after a really bad day, or week? If so, you’re not alone. How do you pull yourself together and get up even when you just want to quit?
The feeling comes in all shapes and sizes, from many different sources. Sometimes, your child is out of control, disobedient, defiant and you are pushed to your absolute limit. Other times, you feel like you just can’t win and that life for every other parent around you is perfect, while you’re struggling to stand on your own two feet. Sometimes it’s exhaustion. You’re so tired you have no idea how you will face another day, let alone make it through the rest of the one you’re currently in.
Emotion. It comes with the territory of parenthood. From birth on, our children will travel through seasons of ups and downs, good times and bad. How do we, as parents, help them navigate these tricky waters of life?
Ask anyone who knows me well and they’ll tell you: I love movies. I probably love them a little too much. In fact, my wife and I have been known to speak to one another in full movie lines. Yeah, it’s that bad!
More than the lines, though, is the story. I love a good story, good plot line, and especially good acting. Give me a Shawshank Redemption-Crash-Avengers-Braveheart mashed into one big cinematic experience and I’ll give you one happy man! There’s something about story, plot, and delivery that makes movies so darn good, and incredibly meaningful to our lives.