Sometimes the foster and adoptive journey gets the best of us. The life we knew, or hoped for, has been reduced to a pile of rubble. And we wonder, “Will I ever crawl out of this?”
I was emailing back and forth with a friend the other day, who was providing content for a new adoption article I’m writing for this fall, when she apologized for taking so long to get stuff to me. Then she shared some of their recent trials. Their son had recently broken his arm on a trampoline. When they went in to see his pediatrician, things went from bad to worse. The doctor flippantly told them he may have bone cancer.
On the road of foster care and adoption, you and I will encounter many well-meaning people who may not be so well-meaning. How do you respond to people whose words or actions are highly offensive to you?
For years I have allowed others a free pass when they have overstepped into our adoptive and foster family. I’ve given grace and gritted my teeth while people say passive aggressive things. I have dismissed inappropriate comments as ignorant. I’ve even herded my children away and given them extra hugs, kisses and explanations for another’s rude behavior. In an effort not to embarrass the offender, I have allowed my children to feel shame and uncertainty about who they are and who we are as a family.