The Stuff I Learned From My Traumatic Past.

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“Your past may explain you, but it doesn’t define you.” This last installment of our summer series, “The Stuff I Learned,” is an honest story of one family’s struggle through the dark, hard places of trauma and despair, to the places (and person) of Hope.

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Don’t miss out on this amazing interview with adoptee, Sandeep Thomas, and his two special guests (you’ll have to listen to find out who!), as they share how they have found, and continue to find, hope, joy, and gratitude on the sometimes difficult journey of adoption.

Listen Now.

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Notes and Quotes.

“That loss of my mother really just made me feel hopeless.”

“In India, if you don’t have an education, you don’t have a future.”

“All of these questions were roaming around in my head: “Why as a 5 year old did I have to go through that?”

“Unfortunately, a lot of the anger and frustration from the adoptee is directed back at the adoptive mom…the most caring person in my life.”

“What Satan meant for evil, God really meant for good.  It’s been a continuous uphill journey and some days it is harder than others.”

“When he lost his mother, that loss was so deep that nothing else mattered… He would constantly tell me, ‘you are not my mother and you never will be.'”

“We are not super-heros.  We are in the trenches with them and it is a life of sacrifice.”

[shareable]We are not super-heros. We are in the trenches with them and it is a life of sacrifice.[/shareable]

“I felt caged in a place where I didn’t belong.”

Stuff I Learned from My Son’s Traumatic Past (from Vanita)…

  • It is only God. Hope comes from the Lord.
  • Having people specifically pray has been our biggest weapon.
  • God’s Word is also a powerful weapon.
  • It is a long journey. Persevere even when they are pushing you away.
  • The older our kids get, the more we realize how little control we have (as parents).
  • Forgive. Apologize. Sacrifice.

Stuff I Learned from My Traumatic Past (from Sandeep and Ruth)…

  • True healing can only come from Jesus.
  • Continue to fill your child’s life with Jesus, the Word, and prayer.
  • Accepting Christ and the gratitude that flows from that changes everything!
  • God is not going to leave you.  He will always be there for you.
  • As an adoptee, I need to be aware of my limits and ask for the grace of God daily.

Resources and Links.

Years ago, Sandeep Thomas faced horrible tragedy and trauma as a young child in India.  However, in the providence of God he was adopted at age 6. and this dramatically changed the course of his life. The trauma he went through not only affected him, but his parents as well. He was very rebellious, angry and felt that he was not loved by his own family. After 11 years of failure, hardship, and many struggles, Sandeep surrendered his life to Jesus and was transformed from the inside by the grace of God. Today a UW graduate, he is a national speaker who raises awareness of adoption.  You can read some of his blog posts on The Crimson Road.

[reminder]How about you? What have you learned from your traumatic past? What have you learned from your child’s traumatic past?[/reminder]

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The Stuff I Learned From My Traumatic Past.

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Mike and Kristin Berry are the Co-Founders of The Honestly Adoption Company and have been parents for nearly two decades. They are the authors of six books, and the host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.

Sarah Gray

Sarah Gray is the executive assistant to Mike and Kristin Berry. And she is the best in the land. In addition to providing a warm and friendly response to the many emails our company receives on a weekly basis, she also manages Mike and Kristin’s speaking and meeting schedules, and makes sure that team events go off without a hitch.

Nicole Goerges

Nicole Goerges is a Content Contributor & Special Consultant for The Honestly Adoption Company. She works with Mike and Kristin as a recurring co-host for the Honestly Adoption Podcast, and co-host of Kitchen Table Talks, exclusive video content for Oasis Community, along with Kristin. She is a fellow adoptive mom, and former foster parent.

Matt McCarrick

Matt McCarrick is the Content Production Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. If you’ve loved listening to our podcast, or enjoyed any of the videos trainings we’ve published, you have Matt to thank. He oversees all of our content production, from video edits, to making sure the tags are correct on YouTube, to uploading new videos to Oasis, to hitting publish on a podcast episode, he’s a content wonder!

Karen Anderson

Karen Anderson is the Community Engagement Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends the bulk of her time interacting with, and helping, people through our various social media channels, as well as providing support for Oasis Community members through chat support or Zoom calls. In the same spirit as Beaver, Karen is also passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and supported. Karen is also an FASD trainer and travels often, equipping and encouraging parents.

Beaver Trumble

Beaver Trumble is the Customer Care Specialist for The Honestly Adoption Company. Chances are, if you have been in need of technical support, or forgotten your password to one of our courses, you have interacted with Beaver. He is an absolute pro at customer care. In fact, he single-handedly revolutionized our customer care department last year. Beaver is passionate about connecting with parents and making them feel loved and encouraged.

Kristin Berry

Kristin Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Content Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. She spends most of her time researching and connecting with guests for our podcast, as well as direction, designing and publishing a lot of the content for our social media channels, blog and podcast. She loves to connect with fellow parents around the world, and share the message of hope with them.

Mike Berry

Mike Berry is the co-founder of, and Chief Marketing Specialist for, The Honestly Adoption Company. He spends the bulk of his time and energy designing and building many of the resources you see within our company, as well as social media and email campaigns. His goal is to use media as a means to encourage and equip parents around the world. He is also the co-host of The Honestly Adoption Podcast.