We Are More Than Our Adoption.

Our society prides itself on titles, positions, rankings, and statistics. It’s how we identify pro-atheletes, leaders of major corporations, and our favorite sports teams. Often, it’s how we identify ourselves. But we have learned that, in our family, we are much more than a title.

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Ok, Ok I understand our blog is called Confessions of an Adoptive Parent. It’s easy to think that we eat sleep and breathe adoption. Our title is a brand but it isn’t all that we are. Adoption, to us, is more like a surname. A last name is an identifier but it isn’t a person’s sole identity.

How To Navigate Christmas With Children Who Have Special Needs.

It’s a question we face every year between Thanksgiving and Christmas: How can we navigate the sensory overload of this season with our children? We’ve discovered a few keys…

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The malls are decorated with garland, bows, and lighted wreaths suspended in mid-air between stores and shops. Display windows have followed suit with decorative frosting in the corners and mannequins dressed in cold-weather attire. Starbucks debuted their red holiday cups, and radio stations are beginning to play Christmas music on loop. There’s no doubt about it — the holidays are here.

How Empathy Changes The Game For Families In The Trenches.

*Editors Note- This is a guest post from our good friend Michelle McKinney. She is an adoptive mother and blogger. She describes herself as an imperfect wife and an even more imperfect mom who decided long ago, “Why bring more kids into the world when there are so many here already who need forever homes?” She believes all kids deserve a family. Every single one. You can read her work with HIV advocacy by visiting thoughtsfrommichelleskitchen.com.

When you’re in the trenches of the foster or adoptive journey, empathy can go a long way on the path of healing. But what does that look like and how can others be that person of empathy?

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Last Monday I traveled with my two littles from Las Vegas to UCLA to have the usual blood work and to get the 2 month supply of life-saving meds like we do every 8 weeks. It’s always a really, really long day. Hospitals and traveling across the desert with kids have a way of taking it out of you.

Because I’ve Been There, I’m Asking…”Mind Your Own Business!”

Gossip hurts. Gossip is no fun and it tears someone down quicker than the blink of an eye. My family has been through the ringer with this one. That’s why I’m asking politely…please mind your own business!

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I see my children tense before I even know why. We’ve been snuggled up on the couch for the last hour enjoying a family movie night. My youngest has built a nest of blankets so cozy and warm I feel like I could stay snuggled up there forever. Without warning, his body becomes ridged. I notice that my older son has his fists clenched firmly. My daughter has pulled her blanket tighter around her. My hearing seems to be fading in this fourth decade of my life so it takes me a moment to hear the approaching sirens, I too feel my heart skip a beat.

3 Ways To Take Care Of Yourself When The Journey Gets Tough.

Season 4, Episode 33- The Honestly Speaking Parenting Podcast

It’s not a question of “If you’ll become tired,” it’s a question of “When you become tired.” As much as we’d like to say we have the strength to handle the trials of foster care and adoption, the reality is, it can take the life out of you. How do you take care of yourself when this happens?

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Time and time again we find ourselves hitting the wall emotionally, physically, and spiritually. We love our kids so deep, it makes the deepest ocean look like a puddle. This is never a question in our mind. But, along the way, we run out of gas. There are seasons when our children’s special needs wear us thin. Or, the day in and day out battles of parenting break us. We need rest.

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How To Find Hope When Everything Seems Hopeless.

It’s easy to find yourself at a hopeless point on the foster and adoptive journey. You wonder, “How did I get here?” Soon, that wondering can turn into, “Will I ever find hope?” We believe you can.

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It’s late but I’m finally on a flight home after an incredible weekend in New York City. I’ve just spent the day interacting with an amazing adoptive parent community in Brooklyn. I’m inspired as I listen to their stories, hear their hearts, and see their smiles. I can’t help but feel grateful to be a part of this special day. I love this crowd. They’re my crowd. They’re my people. I’ve seen hundreds of faces today, but one I can’t seem to get out of my mind. One mom, who desperately longs for a positive relationship with the child she adopted years ago.

5 Reasons The Refresh Conference Should Be Circled On Your Calendar!

The road of adoption and foster care can be filled with exhaustion and trials. Thankfully, there’s an event coming soon where thousands of parents just like us can find strength!

We knew it from the moment we walked in- this was our crowd. No one faking it, no one pretending to be something they were not, no one in denial over the reality of this journey. Just a real, authentic, and safe community of like-minded people. Where we came from didn’t matter. Whether we were rich, poor, or somewhere in the middle mattered not. Neither did the fact that we were wounded in one way or another, and had each failed a time or two on this journey.

“My Child’s Attachment Disorder Is Taking The Life Out Of Me!”

Season 4, Episode 32- The Honestly Speaking Parenting Podcast

The likelihood of parenting a child who suffers from attachment issues, in foster care and adoption, is high. What does this look like, and how do you build healthy attachment with your child?

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It’s easy to take it personally. In fact, if you’re currently on this road with your child you know exactly what this looks like, and how it feels. You’ve probably had moments where you’ve felt like a complete failure as a parent. We know precisely how that feels. The truth is, however, you’re not a failure and this isn’t your fault. Your child suffers from trauma deeply imbedded within them long before you came into the picture.

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